Preference
By Leah Faih
I came across a news report recently that touted the perfect woman in 1913 was 5'7" and 171. Shocking?! Not to me. I've had my own weight issues my entire life and fluctuated greatly. Funny thing, as you'll read on in Matt's story here, our adult weights hit about the same numbers. At my largest I was in the 170's and lowest in the 120's. But what I found was when I'm in the will of God he levels everything out. He makes me healthy, HEALTHY above all things. Not necessarily skinny, but strong and healthy. Many people live on the extreme side of weight due to abuse or pain in their lives. When you see someone who is very thin, please don't assume they just have a quick metabolism or someone who is overweight that they just don't have any self control. Food is a natural way to cope with pain and it's okay to use it as such, but God has a better way, one where food or the lack of it does not control you but God gently leads you and guides you.
Free To Eat- A Forced Anorexic's Testimony
Matthew's Food Deliverance and Learning to Eat Again
By Kansas (Matthew) Stoskopf
Our weight. Our size. Our food. A way to a means, or a means to an end? Today “thin” is “in,” only by thin I mean anorexic-ally thin. Nazi concentration camp thin is the size that most desire, and for what reason? Could it be society, and what drives society today? Could it be that the declining waist line of America can be directly correlated to our relationship with God? When you get close to the Holy Spirit sometimes things come to you and they seem foreign at first, as if they come from someone other than yourself. The world tells you that your weight is a way to a mean number, or the average in society today. They want you to feel as though you are a part of those numbers grouped together. It is just like high school, only your group is not eating. Now what if you never realized that you were unhealthy? What if you were so blinded to the truth that you couldn't see it if it was directly in front of your face? What if you also didn't realize that this way to a means is also a way to your end? It takes the power of God to snap someone out of that trance. It is sort of like when Jesus rebukes a demon, and says this type only comes out through prayer and fasting. Only in this case, it only comes out through prayer and eating.
The truth is for someone like me, we have been brainwashed into thinking that we need to live with abuse, molestation, and complete control over our food. We are complete slaves, even into adulthood. The problem is most people don’t even realize that they are someone’s slave. They thought slavery was abolished, but I am here to tell you that it is more rampant than ever. It was only through the Salvation and power of the almighty Gospel of Jesus Christ that I was set free. I don’t have to live like this. I don’t have to live beaten down into submission every day. Jesus died for me, and He is calling on me to pick up my mat and walk, for I am healed! I am set free, and God is all powerful. He will strike down those wicked ones and send them down to the one whom they serve. There are countless foods that most take for granted that I had previously never tried, as everything I ingested was carefully calculated, as food equals brain power. Brain power improves your overall state of being, giving you power, both physically and mentally. They don’t want you to have power. They want you weak. They, even as you get older, still want you weak, as to control you. If they are bigger and stronger they can push you around. Add to that you’re starved and you have no way out. No means of saving yourself. For me it wasn't until I hit 34 years old that I was set free. Seriously. These people would eat all day long, but scream at me if I was eating cheerios or oatmeal, as it stinks. The food is too loud; I can’t hear Maury contestants yell at each other. Oh, and if your abusers are like mine, you will be forced into watching hard core porn as a young child. I can’t take this, I have no way out I often felt. If I could only kill myself, I would be out of this mess. But no, then comes the realization that they have broken you down so far that you don’t even have the courage, strength, and fortitude to go through with it.
I’m here to tell you that there is a way out. There is a light shining in the darkness. I come not as the light, but only as a witness of the light. God had the ability to deliver me at any moment, I just wasn't ever told about God. I didn't even realize that God actually existed. For me, whatever He did instruct me was thrown down. I was blocked from following His will for my life. This no surprise as abusers are demonic, mimicking God, only doing the opposite. Do you really believe? Honestly, or is part of your brain in belief and part of it in disbelief? Unless you are in the 100 percent belief category, you don’t take into account that everything that happened then in those pages can happen now. God does have that power. He can perform miracles on your behalf. What about the Holy Spirit? Do you know what it is? Or is it just a line in the doxology? Is it merely your cue to reach for your coat in preparation of the run to the front door following the service? You know your family doesn't really believe, church is just a place where we go on Sunday; well, Christmas and Easter. Who is the face behind the beard? Who is Jesus? For me, all I knew was that he was born in a stable, and we got presents.
The problem with presents, are that from the wrong people, they spoil the heart. They are gifts to block your mind from realizing the truth. It’s as if to say, sorry I ruined your life, but how about some beer and whiskey to drown it out with? They want you famished. They want you to drown your mind out with alcohol, as it keeps you from being sound minded. It keeps you enslaved. I’m here to tell you that I've known quite a few homeless people in my days working deep inner city neighborhoods, and I would rather spend the rest of my life with nothing, than to be with my abusers. I have God, and I believe in His provision. I know 3 girls who went around the country with little more than their bicycles, sleeping bags, and a journal to document their travels. Their mission: to spread the good news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. In the process, they learned how God will deliver you in the face of adversity. God will give you food when you need it most, and through divine miracles never lose weight when there is none. You wonder how Jesus fasted for 40 days? We cannot live on bread alone, and He lived on the Word of God. Jesus lived by the Spirit, watching and learning from His Father. This is the faith as small as a mustard seed that would move mountains. I have been delivered. I was set free. I spend my days dancing proclaiming God’s great news, as you can be set free too! I had to sneak ensures to bed with me as I wasn't allowed to eat enough, and was on the verge of death. The sad part is these abused people are lied to and told that the food they are eating is actually healthy. It is lifeless and void, lacking proper calories or nutritional content.
Through the Spirit, my new, God given family was directed to a course of action, a feeding plan. For some it would be called a re-feeding plan, but I was never allowed to eat. I didn’t know it was fun to eat. I just thought it was something that wasted time that could be better spent doing something else. What could that be you ask? Well, how about whatever my captors desired rather than my own, no doubt. I literally went from 130 lbs to 180 in a single year, and most would still consider me to have a slim build. Who can pack on 50 pounds and still need more? The stomach bloat I exhibit from time to time is like the starved Africans. This is abuse my friends. This is abuse in the highest regard, and there is no excuse for you to suffer. I know people who used to overeat as children, as to make themselves feel undesirable to sexual predators in their family. They are the opposite, but a directly related group. In most cases the only positive experiences happening in the home were when they were eating. This is subconscious, and most don’t even realize it. If I just eat another box of cookies I can block the pain of my abuse for a while.
Matthew 18
At that time the disciples came up and asked Jesus, Who then is [really] the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? 2 And He called a little child to Himself and put him in the midst of them, 3 And said, Truly I say to you, unless you repent (change, turn about) and become like little children [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving], you can never enter the kingdom of heaven [at all].
4 Whoever will humble himself therefore and become like this little child [trusting, lowly, loving, forgiving] is greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
5 And whoever receives and accepts and welcomes one little child like this for My sake and in My name receives and accepts and welcomes Me.
6 But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in and [a]acknowledge and cleave to Me to stumble and sin [that is, who entices him or hinders him in right conduct or thought], it would be better ([b]more expedient and profitable or advantageous) for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck and to be sunk in the depth of the sea.
GOD WILL PUNISH YOUR ABUSERS! FEAR NOT!
7 Woe to the world for such temptations to sin and influences to do wrong! It is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the person on whose account or by whom the temptation comes!
8 And if your hand or your foot causes you to stumble and sin, cut it off and throw it away from you; it is better (more profitable and wholesome) for you to enter life maimed or lame than to have two hands or two feet and be thrown into everlasting fire.
9 And if your eye causes you to stumble and sin, pluck it out and throw it away from you; it is better (more profitable and wholesome) for you to enter life with only one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the hell (Gehenna) of fire.
DON’T LISTEN TO MOST CHURCHES TODAY! THEY WILL PROCLAIM THAT YOU SHOULD FORGIVE YOUR ABUSERS. THIS IS WRONG; YOU CAN’T BE OF SOUND MIND AS LONG AS THEY ARE STILL CONTROLLING YOU! I suggest you all read Pilgrim’s Progress, as it is a highly anointed book documenting the process of following God. You should pass on the word of the good news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, to the other victims and leave the City of Destruction. It would be better to be in Sodom and Gomorrah in their day of judgment than to still be back there! You have been set free. You are an innocent victim. Do not let anything turn you back. Stay mentally sound and free of the lies and deception.
10 Beware that you do not despise or feel scornful toward or think little of one of these little ones, for I tell you that in heaven their angels always are in the presence of and look upon the face of My Father Who is in heaven.
11 [c]For the Son of man came to save [[d]from the penalty of eternal death] that which was lost.
12 What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray and gets lost, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountain and go in search of the one that is lost?
13 And if it should be that he finds it, truly I say to you, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that did not get lost.
14 Just so it is not the will of My Father Who is in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost and perish.
Your life has meaning. Jesus died for you and has a wonderful plan for your life. He rejoices in you, as do we! Take that first step right now toward getting set free. I know you have the strength in you. It won’t be easy, as family and friends might tell you that you are crazy. You will be told that your life is perfect. Don’t fall for the devils lies. Get set free today. Cut out contact with all abusers. God has delivered you from them. They no longer have any power over you. They will be punished by God, so find your joy, find out God’s will, His wonderful plan for your life. He will bless the work of your hands. He will bless the fruit of your womb! God wants you free, as to let not one more suffer by the hands of them.
What Kansas wrote here was so empowering to me!! I hope it blesses you all as well. To those who are broken and abused and suffering from lack of control over food or too much control, I say: God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life if you allow Him!
Here is the news story I was talking about earlier talking about the perfect girl in 1913 being 5'7" and 171 lbs!
This is the best news report I've heard in a long time! Listen up my friends!! In an age where skinny is the new beautiful and health is tossed out the window in favor of bulimia and anorexic models who eat once a month, I'm happily surprised to find that in a day and age without electricity and automobiles, fast food, or sedentary jobs, this woman at 5'7" and 171 lbs was considered perfect. Now, she was an athlete and would take 25 mile hikes. She ate healthy. And she lived to be 91 yrs old. This is what I believe God would say to everyone out there: be active, garden, eat the food you grow and if you can't grow your own yet, eat as fresh as possible. Enjoy life, not your ideal pants size! This article also says that people in the nowadays "overweight" category live longer than those in the "normal" category and it's only people in the upper two obese categories that has a negative impact. So, for all you ladies and gents who are active and eating healthy but not where the Hollywood world would have you be- eat up! :) live life!!! Be happy, and live longer than those who starve themselves but look "great" in a bikini (you don't need to wear one anyways, they're over rated and overexposed :) And anyone who is struggling to lose some major weight- hopefully you will be encouraged that you don't have to starve yourself to be the perfect healthy weight God created you to be and your healthy goal might not be as far away as you once thought!! All those people on TV? Those skinny models? Well, they aren't what was considered healthy and perfect in 1913. :) As Michelle and I like to say "put some clothes on, work in your garden, and go enjoy that cheeseburger you've been craving!!!" :) Can I get an Amen!
So, if you eat well, are active, REJOICE, you will most likely live longer than those who starve themselves to be a "perfect size" God has a beautiful plan for all of us. We are to work hard everyday in some physical manner and enjoy fresh food prepared in love- gardening is wonderful for both of these things but if you can't garden yet, I encourage you to take part in someone elses! I've always felt healthy, but sometimes guilty to be in the "overweight" category when I didn't feel that I was. The devil really wants us all sick and if you've ever seen a fashion runway and you are in your right mind, you want to cry for those girls as they look like they're about ready to pass out and just got out of a concentration camp. We spend WAY too much time struggling to lose that extra 5 lbs. I say "stop worrying and START LIVING!!!" Who knows, that extra 5, 10, 15, or 20 lbs might just give you an extra few great healthy years. Focus on HEALTH, ACTIVITY, AND THE HOLY SPIRIT will guide you. Focus on HIM, our Author and Creator of all life. Did you know we are equipped by God to perfectly regulate weight? When we get out of His will we have to turn to diets and the world for answers. That is okay in the short term but not okay long term. When we look to the world, Victoria's Secret, Playboy, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit models, our minds shut down, we cannot focus on God and we will become unhappy. We will overeat or undereat. Food is to nourish us. Back 100 yrs ago, they actually had to EAT to get all the vitamins and nutrients they needed. Someone had to start a fire and knead bread. LIFE went into the food they ate and they exercised just in making the food! Families sat down together and talked about their day. They sat around a fire at night and mom's made clothes, father's chopped wood. God has a perfect place for all of us to be where we wake up everyday refreshed and not worrying about anything- especially our weight! Be free today my friends, get in the Word of God and He will regulate everything!! And if your pants or the mirror starts talking to you, YOU TALK BACK. Repeat after me "I AM FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE BY GOD!" When you practice getting into the peace and presence of God and getting all sin and worldliness out of your life your weight will fall into perfect place... But don't be surprised if God's place for you does not look like the world's perfect place! The world want to see your body, it wants to control you, and make you sin. A beautiful healthy woman of God can get eaten alive in this world if she does not have the armor of God. We need men to see beauty and healthy as the same thing- and start seeing woman through God's eyes!!! Oh, and stop looking at porn and naked woman on the TV- it hurts your marriage and your PERFECT AND HEALTHY wife! Amen!
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